Mock Manga: Book One
by Mock Manga
Summary: Yugi passes out during a duel; Yugi gets an ancient cat; Yugi and Kaiba share a bad day; Akeifa gets a tounge ring.
1. Yugi's Nuts

Book One

Chapter One

"Yugi's Nuts"

"Stop stalling, Yugi. Are you going to play or forfeit?" Kaiba Seto - easily irritated by delays of any kind - prompted his opponent. Yugi (Yami edition) calmly looked across the dueling field and continued to ponder his next move. The two were outside in Kaiba's latest Duel Monsters arena. Once again, the unreasonably wealthy president of Kaiba Corp. had challenged the King of Games to a duel, wanting to win back his title as champion. Jonouchi, Honda, and Anzu stood on the sidelines, cheering on their friend. Mokuba stood next to his brother.

"Yugi!" Kaiba shouted again. "Make a move!"

"I will!" Yugi, although he didn't have a very good hand, had great faith in his cards. He felt rather nervous - what? Yugi nervous in a duel? No, he felt unwell. His eyes had begun to water, and he was starting to feel sick to his stomach. Oh well. No queasy feeling was going to stop the legendary champion of Duel Monsters; the supreme leader of ancient times; the strongest pharoh to ever walk over the sands of Egypt. Focusing his eyes back on the dueling area, Yami Yugi raised his card above his head -

and dropped it on the ground. And thereafter preceded to run to the nearest bunch of lilac bushes, where he fell to his knees.

"What the hell?? What are you doing?" Kaiba yelled after him from his place in the arena. Really, it wasn't like Yugi to run away from a duel. Even when losing. Especially when losing.

"What are you doing?" he repeated.

Kaiba's referee stepped closer to the bushes and replied, "He appears to be vomiting, sir."

Upon hearing that, Kaiba's look of complete surprise was usurped by one of repulsion. "That's dis-gust-ing!"

Sure enough, Yugi was puking as if there was no tomorrow. Jonouchi and Honda stood still, utterly taken aback by the dramatic turn of events. Anzu cried out her pattented "Yugi!" and ran towards her fallen friend. Mokuba pushed his way from his brother's side, through surprised KC employees, to Yugi.

"Hey Yugi!" the younger Kaiba called when he'd reached him. "Are you okay? Was the duel too much for you?"

"Yugi, what's the matter? What happened?" Anzu asked.

After Yugi had finished puking, he sat back on his heels to answer his two friends. Unfortunately, he didn't get that far before he fell backwards (away from the puke and into Anzu's lap) and swooned. Anzu gasped.

"Whoa, Yugi, are you okay? Hey Yugi?" Mokuba turned to the nearest KC employee. "We need to get an ambulance here for him now. I think he's really sick."

"Yeah, sick in the head," Kaiba the elder responded. "It doesn't matter. Unless he can finish the game, I win!"

"I don't think he's going to be able to duel for a while, Seto," Mokuba said as he glanced back at the sweaty, game master.

"No … no, I can finish." Yugi feebly attempted to sit up.

_'Where did that come from? Why am I so sick all of a sudden?' _Yugi tried to call to mind what he'd eaten during the day. Mom's rice balls for lunch; miso soup for breakfast; and a few sodas after school. Something must have been past its expiration date. But, regardless, the duel must go on. Placing a hand on the ground, he tried to push himself up. Slowly and delicately, he came to a full standing position.

_'There. That's not so bad. I guess it must have passed …'_

Whoops. Yugi felt his knees buckle under him. Whiplash followed, which further increased his feeling of discomfort.

"Yugi!" Anzu grabbed hold of Yugi's arm and tried to help him back up. "Come on, get up. Forget the duel. You need to go home right now."

"No. I'm not leaving this duel unfinished." Yugi turned his attention towards Kaiba. "I'm not forfeiting and I'm not leaving." Before he could rise to his knees again, another wave of nausea broke over him. Up came the rice, and what was probably some of the soda. Anzu leaned forward, laid a comforting hand on his back, and politely handed him a handkerchief.

"Thanks." He took the frilled piece of fabric and wiped some of the smell from his nose. _'Okay, maybe this won't work after all. I wonder if Kaiba would allow me to duel from sitting over here.'_

"Yugi! Duel or forfeit! Time's running ouuuuuut!!" Kaiba yelled, his glutes tensing, causing a tight wad of his cottony underbriefs to compile between his buttocks.

_'What's wrong with us?_' Yami Yugi temporarily retreated to his mind to confer with little Yugi.

Little Yugi, as he noticed, was looking a little pale_. 'I don't know. I feel so …I don't know. Really sick. _

_'What do you think caused it?'_

_'I don't know. I've only felt like this one - two other times. When I had an allergic reaction.' _Little Yugi's head began to wobble on his neck. _'Maybe I'd better sit down …'_

_'Yes, perhaps you - '_

Little Yugi's spirit form collapsed in a punk-ish looking pile on the floor of his mind.

_'Yugi!'_ Yugi (YE Yami edition ) ran over to Yugi (LE little edition ) and knelt beside him. _'Yugi, can you hear me? Yugi?'_

Sadly, there was no response. Yugi LE was out like a light. For the night. In the middle of his fight. His mind took a flight on a kite to a place that wasn't bright.

All right.

In the real world, Anzu was becoming semi spastic towards the unresponsive Yugi. "He's not answering me, guys. Come on, help me get him up so we can get him to the emergancy room. And call his house and tell his grandpa what's going on." Jonouchi and Honda obeyed by lifting Yugi out of Anzu's lap, and then carrying him from the field. Kaiba felt like it was time for another coniption.

"If he leaves, I win! No make up matches, no continuations!!"

"Hey, Kaiba, does he look like he can duel right now?" Jonouchi adjusted the body in his arms so he could turn Yugi's face towards Kaiba. Mokuba, meanwhile, took out his cell phone (adorned with a picture of his favorite capsule monster) and called for an ambulance.

"Let's go wait around front for the ambulance to show up," he said, closing up his phone. "I called already and it's on its way."

* * *

Inside the hospital room, which was divided by a screen, Yami Yugi lay tossing and crying incoherantly.

"Wake up! Wake up, Yugi!" Surprisingly enough, this was uttered by Yugi himself.

"Yugi, what do you mean?" Anzu asked.

"Yeah, who're you talking to?" Honda added.

"He's talking to his other self. Or his other self is talking to him … or something." Jonouchi surmised.

"What's wrong with Yugi?" Anzu asked Yugi. "Is little Yugi okay?"

Yugi (YE) merely responded with, "Yugi, wake up."

Just then a doctor came. "You're friend's had an allergic reaction to something. We're not sure what it is, yet. Do you know what he's allergic to?"

All eyes landed on Anzu. "I don't know. This has never happened before."

Yugi's eye's fluttered open and tried to focus on the situation surrounding him. He was sitting up in a bed, wearing a hospital gown over his -very- itchy skin, with Anzu, Honda, and Jonouchi staring at him. And also a doctor. He opened his mouth to speak, but realized that it felt nearly impossible to breathe. Before Anzu could cry out and run to his side, the world went grey again and he found himself once more in the hallway of his mind.

Little Yugi was nowhere to be seen. "Yugi?" Yami Yugi called. He ran to the door of Little Yugi's mind, only to find that it was shut. "Yugi?" he pulled and pushed the door, trying everything he could think of to open it. But it was stuck fast.

"Yugi! Open your door! Can you hear me?" Yami Yugi pressed his ear to the wood door, straining to hear any sounds of life from within.

Silence.

Once again, Yugi YE found himself sitting upright in the hospital bed. Anzu was holding his sweaty, itchy, swollen hand.

"Anzu! I can't find him! I can't find Yugi!"

"What do you mean you can't find him? Where is he?" Anzu asked.

"He's not there. And his door is locked. I can't find his spirit anywhere. And his door is always open!"

Anzu understood about half of what the Yugi before her said. "What?"

"Yugi's spirit collasped, and now I can't find him."

The doctor came back into the room and said, "We've narrowed down his list of allergies. It's either a reaction to cashues or peanuts."

_'Nuts?'_ Yami thought. _'Nuts?!_'

"Oh no!" his deep voice intoned. Turning to Anzu he said, "I ate the nuts!"

Turning inward, Yami Yugi called to mind the previous night, when he, hungry and in possesion of the body, went downstairs for a midnight snack. Being ignorant of his host's allergic tendencies associated with members of the nut family, Yugi YE had poured himself a heaping bowl of Kellog's Granola Nut Bran cereal.

_'But why didn't I feel the effect then?'_ he wondered. Looking down at the glowing millenium puzzle (which the hospital staff had been unable to remove), he realized the puzzle must have protected him by delaying his reaction. The strain of the duel must have been too much, and that's when Yami Yugi's eating habbits caught up with Little Yugi's body.

"I ATE THE NUTS!"

Yugi's generally understanding friends looked at him with concern (Anzu), surprise (Honda), and confusion (Jonouchi).

"I ate the nuts! I ate the nuts!"

"Yugi," Anzu ventured, "what nuts?"

"The nuts! The nuts in the breakfast cereal. I ate them!"

"Uh, we know. That's why you're here," Jonouchi said.

"And now I can't find him," Yami Yugi cried again.

"Okay," Anzu touched one hand to her forehead and held the other out for silence. "You ate the nuts in the breakfast cereal, which is why little Yugi got sick, and now you can't find him in your mind. Is that it?"

"Yes," Yami Yugi said desperately.

Honda waited until Anzu put her hand down, and then said, "It doesn't really matter who ate the nuts, because we're all hear now. The doctor will give you something to make you better and then everything will be back to nor-, back to the way it was."

"But what -" Yugi YE began.

"No 'buts.'" Anzu interupted. "You're only going to make yourself feel even worse if you keep this up. You need to get some rest and try to fight this off."

"That's true, but -"

Like a streak of lightning, Anzu's arm shot out, stopping, palm flexed, just in front of Yugi's face. "I said no 'buts.' If you feel that badly about it, the only thing to do is fight it off and get better."

The room was silent. Even Yami Yugi, who had, in his past life, ruled thousands of men, decided not to disagree with Mazaki Anzu.

"Now lie back down and go to sleep," she continued, retracting her hand. "We'll leave, but I'm going to be back in to check on you in ten minutes, and you'd better be asleep by then."

Yami stared at her, but didn't object. When Anzu finally tore her eyes away from his, she, Honda, and Jonouchi left the room quietly. Jonouchi slipped his debilitated friend a thumbs up before closing the door.

With only ten minutes to fall asleep, Yugi YE tried to put all of the anxiety from his mind. Or at least enough of it to loose conciousness. He found, however, that even he was affected by the strain of Yugi's severe allergic reaction. Sleep, it seemed, wasn't all that far away . . .

* * *

White walls. White ceiling. Metal bed.

Yugi knew this place. It was the hospital ward. And, unless he was mistaken, it looked like the same room he'd been in during his first diabetic shock. How ironic. But what the heck was he doing here now?

_'Yami? Where are we?'_

_'Yugi! You're here.'_

_'Where had I been?'_

'_Then maybe Anzu was right. We only needed rest.'_

'_Whoa, what did Anzu say? Did I pass out?'_

'_Yes. You had an allergic reaction.'_

'_What? What am I allergic to now?'_

'_Nuts.'_

'_I've always been allergic to nuts. I never eat them.'_

'_I know that now.'_

'_Then WHY am I in this hospital room? What happened? What did Anzu say?"_

'I_ ate the nuts, Yugi.'_

"What? You ate nuts? In my body?"

'_I'm sorry. I didn't know.'_

"Oh man. Now I remember. We were in the middle of that duel. I passed out during the duel?"

'_Yes.'_

"Because you ate nuts."

'_Yes.'_

Little Yugi sighed. "Is it the next day already?"

'_Yes.'_

"I wonder if this counts as an excused absence."

_'I'm sorry, Yugi.'_

Yugi LE shrugged. "It's okay."

_'Kaiba won the duel by default.'_

"That's okay too, I guess."

Both Yugis looked up when the hospital room door slowely opened.

"Anzu!" Yugi LE said.

"Hey, Yugi. How are you? Are you okay? Are you _you_?"

"I'm okay now. Is anybody else here?" Yugi tried to see past her into the hall.

"No, it's just me. I wanted to stop by before school and see if you were any better." Anzu closed the door behind her and stood next to Yugi's bed. "We were really worried about you yesterday."

"Yeah …"

"So you'll be in school tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Great. I have a surprise for you," she smiled.

"Huh? What do you mean? What kind of surprise?"

"Duh, Yugi, I can't tell you. You'll just have to wait and see. So you'd better get well so you don't miss it." Anzu turned to leave.

"Uh, okay."

"I'll see you tomorrow!" she said before slipping out the door.

"Um, right. See you tomorrow."


	2. Cat Reincarnate

Book One

Chapter Two:

Cat Reincarnate

"Hey, Yugi! Don't leave!" Anzu waved down Motou Yugi in the halls after school let out. Yugi turned around and waited for her to catch up.

"Are you doing anything after school today?" she asked once she'd reached him.

"Um, no, I don't think so . . ."

"Cool. Then can you go somewhere with me? I can't tell you where yet, but can you come?"

"Uh, sure."

"Great!"Anzu skipped ahead of her friend and outside. Yugi ran after her.

Five blocks later, they came to a plain brick building with a small sign reading "Humane Society" on it. Yugi looked up at Anzu.

"Um, Anzu? Why are we here?"

"It's the surprise I told you about," she smiled as though she'd concieved something ingenius.

Yugi continued staring at her, trying to figure out what she meant.

"I'm giving you a pet, Yugi." Anzu's smile widened. Yugi looked back at the building, and then back at his friend. "Wow . . . that's so . . . surprising. Thanks a lot." Finally succeding in producing a smile, Yugi followed Anzu inside.

Inside the run down, poorly lit, animal-smelling building, Yugi looked around through quickly watering eyes.

"Can I help you?" A woman with mop-like hair adressed the two high schoolers.

Yugi blinked up at her.

"Yes, we're here to look at the cats avaible for adoption." Anzu answered.

"To your left," the woman replied, and then turned back to reading an ancient magazine.

"Cats?" Yugi whispered to Anzu.

"Yeah," she whispered back. "You're mom said she didn't want a dog, but that a cat would be okay."

"My mom knows?" Yugi's tearing eyes widedened.

"Yeah. You didn't expect me to bring an animal into her house before I made sure it was okay, did you?"

"Oh. But Anzu . . ." Yugi interupted himself by stifling a sneeze.

"Bless you."

"Thanks."

"Are you okay Yugi? You look kind of glassy-eyed."

"I'm . . ." he shook his head. "I'm, uh," –sniff– "I feel sort of stuffed up all of a sudden."

"You . . . oh no. You're not allergic to cats, are you?"

Probably. It'd figure. "Nah. It must be something else. I'm sure a cat will be really cool."

Anzu's smile returned. "Okay." She looked around and entered the cat room to their left. When Yugi followed, he saw a room the size of his kitchen filled with cages, filled with felines. Instantly, an intense tingle shot up his nasal passage. Trying his best to disguise the increasingly apparent fact that he, indeed, seemed allergic to cats, he blinked his eyes a few thousand times and followed Anzu around the dander/litter-smelling room.

"Oh look, here's a litter of kittens!" Anzu was bent over, peering into a cage. Yugi lifted his neck to get a look at them: Four brown and white kittens sleeping, chewing, and peeing on each other.

"Would you want one of these?" Anzu turned her head towards him.

"They _are_ kind of cute," Yugi had to admitt. "I don't know though." He moved away from the cage and knelt down at another cage sitting on the floor. A scruffy cat with matted black fur stared back at him.

"Aww," he said, squatting down in front of it. "Poor old cat. I'll bet nobody loves it."

Anzu sat on the ground next to him and looked into the cage. "Maybe she was waiting here for you."

_'Pharoh?'_ A feminine voice asked within Yugi's head.

"Huh?"

"What?" Anzu asked.

"Sorry, I thought you said something to me."

"Yeah, I said maybe she was waiting-"

"Not that part. Nevermind."

_'Pharoh? Is it you?'_

This time Yugi jumped up and spun around. "Who said that?"

"Who said what, Yugi?" Anzu stood up and looked down at her empathic friend. Across the room, a goldish tabby began stratching the chickenwire door to its cage.

_'Pharoh? Can you hear me? I'm over here!'_

Weirded out beyond reason, Yugi catiously walked over to the cage. "Kitty?"

_'Master! Is it you?'_

"Huh?"

_'It must be you . . .'_

"Um, Anzu?" he said, without looking away from the cage. "Do you hear anything strange?"

"No. What do _you_ hear?" Teah remained safely standing by the cat with matted fur.

_'It isn't you?'_

"Yugi? Are you okay?"

_'Neverind. Another lost hope.'_

_'Yugi!'_ The Pharoh's voice suddenly rang out in Yugi's head.

"Dack!" Yugi yelled, silenceing the voices for a moment. "Will everyone just stop talking to me?"

Anzu remained standing by the cage in muted concern.

Before Yugi could collect his thoughts and asses the situation, his alter-ego, unannoucend, took possesion of his body and took three bounding steps to the cage that held the talking cat.

"Neffie!" He cried, twining his fingers around the chickenwire.

_'Pharoh! It _is_ you!'_ The said cat started mewing dramatically and clawing again at her cage.

Yami Yugi unlatched the cage door and swung it open, taking the cat into his arms.

_'Neffie!'_

_'Pharoh!'_

"So, uh, is this the cat you want, Yugi?" Anzu asked.

"Neffie, what are you doing here?"

_'Pharoh, I've been waiting centuries for you.'_

_'Um, excuse me,' _Little Yugi irratedly interupted the two. _'Pharoh, would you like to tell me what the HECK is going on??'_

"Anzu," Yami Yugi looked up from the cat in his arms to the pensively smilling girl. "This is the one I want."

" Okay . . . I'll just, go fill out the paperwork then." As she left the room, Anzu reasured herself that for Yugi, a scene like this was really nothing to worry about. Stranger things, by far, had happened on a school day.

_'Yugi,' _Yami Yugi addressed his other half,_ 'this is Neffertiti. She was my cat . . . a very long time ago.'_

If little Yugi had a body at that point, he would have slammed his head into his hand._ 'You're kiding me, right?'_ Why not, though. After all, every one seemed to have been reincarnated. It only figured that Yugi's birthday present would end up being a dead cat.

"Um, Yugi?" Anzu stuck her head back in the doorway. "You need to come sign for the cat."

"Right." Yami Yugi stood up, with Neffie in his arms, and walked lesuirly out to the front counter. The mop-headed woman pointed to the line he needed to sign on, without looking up from her page.

_'Why the boy?'_ Neffertiti asked.

_'What?'_ The Pharoh asked in response.

_'The boy. Why is there another mind in your body?'_

_'Oh. It's his body. My spirit is within the puzzle._

_'Ah. Reincarnation does odd things like that, I suppose.'_

Yami Yugi shrugged inwardly and pushed the paper back across the desk towards the woman.

"Well, she has all her shots already, so all we need to do still is get her a lisence. But that can happen on another day. Okay?" Anzu smiled down at Yugi.

"Yes. Anzu . . . Thank you so much for this."

"You're welcome. I'm glad it worked out so well. You really seem to like that cat."

"I like her very much. I can't tell you what it means to me to have found her. Thank you." Without weighing the consequences, Yami Yugi hugged Anzu on impulse. Not close enough to squish Neffie, of course. Anzu, once released, stood breathlessly blushing and wondering if she had been talking to Yugi, or the 'other' Yugi (blush).

"Er, you're welcome, Yugi," Anzu sputtered, recovering herself.

_'Here, Yugi,' _the Pharoh relinquished control of Yugi's body to Yugi.

_'Gee, thanks. Now that you've picked out my present and hugged Anzu.'_


End file.
